When Mom or Dad Asks To Be a Facebook 'Friend'
The New York Times Washington Post has an amusing article on parents joining face book. I've been through a number of the situations that they mention there. Both of my daughters are my Facebook friends, and some of their friends have friended me as well. On the other hand, my younger daughter has refused to accept my "friend" request on MySpace. the problem with cross-generational "friending" isn't restricted to children complaining about their parents. There is also the problem of parents who would like to keep some of their activities somewhat private from their children. Until Facebook adds support for multiple separate personas, both parents and children have to be careful about what applications and other information they make available to whom.
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Well, we crossed this hurdle first with LJ years ago, but LJ lets you set up posting and reading groups. I have a group called 'nokids' and when I do want to post, say, a parenting rant... I just do it without the kids **and their friends**. It would be --so-- inappropriate for their friends to see that I'm frustrated with one of my kids.
Generally I think it's inappropriate to start friending a bunch of Kat's friends. I have a few on my list --that I've known personally for years-- and generally I do my best (first on LJ and now on Facebook) to not intrude much, and when I do so, to be supportive.
I am not the only adult/friend of their parents who are on those kid's friends lists on LJ, btw... there are a few others.
Any parent who starts getting in there and friending their kids friends and chatting it up with them really needs to learn about boundaries. It's one thing to keep an eye on things, it's another to do stuff that they wouldn't do in person. (and yes, the young people who I have friended do say hi to me and sometimes have talked to me a bit about their lives)
Course, we're probably an exception, being as my kids and I are actually on friendly terms with each other. And we do like sending each other stuff periodically on facebook.
PS - it's the Washington Post....
and it would be good if facebook made it possible for us to filter things a bit more with friends lists, although I imagine it might get kinda complicated.